Power walks and starvation

Perhaps this grand occasion will mark the point at which Karen's metabolism and consciousness finally do the decent thing and adjust to the idea that proper way to spend one's advancing years is by sampling fine food and wine, regularly, and welcoming the gradual advance of midriff corpulence as a natural sign of a life well lived. Rather than by pounding one's tenderised soles over mile after punishing mile of Maryland with only the faint promise of a glass of fizzy water and a dog biscuit to sustain one at the end...

Equally likely, of course, is that the Vatican will open a condom factory..